..The Bridal Shower - an English Tea Party for the Bride....

Nov 11th, 4:00 PM EST

The Chunni Chadhana ceremony and Sumangali lunch done, it was time for the BRIDAL SHOWER!! Yes on the same day…3 events back to back…!!

Now earlier in September, Purnima and her gang of BGF’s had the Bridal  shower part 1 at exotic Vegas… Naughty naughty…now don’t ask me what  happened there, but  we all know, whatever happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas!!….So this was essentially part 2 of the shower…with the Moms, Mamies, Chitties, aunties,  cousins and friends…that is  all the women folk, she knew well.

The theme was an English tea party…English tea party! No issues, as we have our very own  English Madame aka Lyne Nataraj, our aunt/friend…and one of the nicest and warmest individual, who gave the nitty gritty of what is involved in a true blue blood English party.  Location again was 1 Yardley Street, Edison, that is Prabha Nagaraj’s home. …Now the nice thing about Prabha chitti’s home (Chitti = aunty in madrasi), we know all her silverware, dinnerware, serverware, glassware as she truly believes in the adage, Mi Casa Es Su Casa (my home is your home) and it has been this way for the last 30 years. Made it easy for us, as we could design the table and décor, sitting in Atlanta/Madison/Connecticut.

So all her tea kettles/ tea mugs/saucers/creamers/sugar bowl, etc from London, Saudi and US were brought out. Rinsed with gentle soap and vinegar, polished until they shone, they were made ready for the shower.  Ashwini, our online queen ordered some cute tea mugs, plates, silverware and some simple paper décor …in Teal. Told ya, teal is  Purni’s favorite color…Shyla and her dear friends from Tampa made these pearl bracelets…yes using memory strings and some gorgeous pearls…gentle, elegant and pretty, these were the bridal shower favors …Then came the food…it had to be light, loads of itsy bitsy finger foods…absolutely no desi stuff. Zero in to Wegmans

What a spread!!!Scones with clotted cream and jam (Lyne’s recipe),danish croissants, delicious salads with cheese, walnuts and fresh greens…yummy fruit bits…cucumber sandwiches (that we never got to taste…!), lovely cupcakes…and oh yes decorated with the gorgeous toppers that Ashwini made…you girls had to be there…! And yes we had the English tea…with some cream and sugar in the creamer and sugar bowl…we also had the desi-lipton patte ki adrakh-elachiwalli-loongwali chai….you can take the desi to Englisthan…but chai tho desi Masalawalla hi chahiye boss!...and yes for the beauties, we had Lemonade. Not sure, how many pints of lemonade, Sahana and Sanju had…hey the kids too had to enjoy…right?

So the stage was set…Purnima’s friends turned up, on the dot of 4:00 PM EST!! next,more friends and family and then Hansa Aunty, Binti and their darling friends, bahu’s and baby…yes we were about 35 women,… yes 35 women in one house at one time…the men had escaped to Pakku, my uncles’s home. Food in hand, it was now time for some games…loads of questions were directed at Purnima to find out how well she knew Raja and his antics…Have to say this…Hansa aunty is one of the sweetest ladies that we have come across…when asked, if she saw some changes in Raja after Purnima and the “LOVE” thing happening…she sweetly said…he has become a more loveable and responsible son…more was the word…as Raja is a lovely person…more talks…and then everyone picked up the bracelets they liked…some picked up one, some took two…all is ok in the name of love and good fun. Then it was time to open the gifts...oh yes,Purni got lots of gifts…lots of kitchenware…gift cards…more kitchen ware, dinner ware…Purnima will soon be practicing recipes and inviting all to her new home…and then ooh la la  …lots n lots of girly  stuff…that Purnima was kinda shy to show…but all her lovely aunts made her  open every single item…the stuff exchanged hands…was ohhed and ahhed…loads of laughter and giggles… Fun! Fun!...Madhu auntie’s bahu’s shared some fun warnings…Honestly, Hansa aunty’ s gang of friends are fabulous…

And then we decided to give the henna candles to all who couldn’t make it to the mehendi evening on Thursday as it was a working day…and it would be difficult to come  all the way from Long Island…Traffic being horrendous. The nicest thing that we heard was from Bela – Hansa auntie’s friend…she said…”there was so much love and warmth being given,…that it is overwhelming”. So sweet…No Bela, Madhu, Shashi…you all are awesome…so loving and warm…Purnima is indeed extremely fortunate that she is getting married to a family, who are so warm and loving.

When we look back, the only thing that stood out in all the ceremonies and all the days, was the warmth and the love…no yelling’s or bickering on slip-ups…none of those “the plate is dirty”…”the coffee is too light or is too cold” or the rice is overcooked” and those ranting and raving that are so common in weddings and when the bride and grooms family meet!!! And it is so sad to hear people make these atrocious comments! Do people who crib, realize what it takes to be a bride’s mom or dad…to bring up a daughter with so much love and care,…give her the values and ensure she grows up to be a lovely human being…only to be humiliated, because the coffee was cold or was light!! Grow up people…if you are truly mature and wise, you will realizethat these things happen and is not intentional! No individual is stupid to spend lakhs of rupees or thousands of dollars to compromise on serving lukewarm coffee! it is ok if the food is a tad salty, or if people arrived a little late or the chai was cold…doesn’t this happen to everyone…so why not join hands and help set the food right or start the ceremony 10 mins latter…heaven will not come down…or rather the sky will not come down!

Why am I writing this?  Beacause, we loved the way here,  in this marriage of Purnima and Raja, the line between the grooms side and bride’s side disappeared and all that  everyone wanted was to have and weave some wounderful  and memorable times, to be together and enjoy the wedding ceremonies… …one thing that rings in my head, was something that Hansa aunty’s friends mentioned…”We all were young girls, and then became moms and now mom-in-laws…we have been there, seen it and done it….we only want  the good stuff for our daughters and daughters-in-law…our daughters-in-law are our  daughters…we have to let go the not so good stuff and embrace the good…else we cannot progress” So true and well said

…Now you know why we had so much fun at  the wedding!...why the bride’s mom Shyla was smiling 24 by 7 and having so much fun, when she should have been stressed out all through the week…and more importantly why the bride had such a fabulous time at her own wedding…

Hope you loved the post…pass on your comments…and only  if I get more than 15 comments, am I going to tell you what happened at the SANGEET…the Sangeet was a blast!! So send in your comments asap..Love you all…